Capstones, Theses and
Dissertations

Adjustment to the dissolution of a romantic
relationship: effects of ex-relationship specific
thought content valence

TABLE OF CONTENTS
Page
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS……………………………………………………………….. iii
ABSTRACT……………………………………………………………………………………………….. iv
CHAPTER 1 INTRODUCTION ………………………………………………………………. 1
CHAPTER 2 LITERATURE REVIEW …………………………………………………….. 10
Romantic Relationship Outcomes…………………………………………………………….. 11
Love and Dissolution Theories………………………………………………………………… 13
Obsession ……………………………………………………………………………………………… 16
Thought Content Valence ……………………………………………………………………….. 19
The Current Study………………………………………………………………………………….. 29
Research Hypotheses……………………………………………………………………………… 31
CHAPTER 3 METHODS ………………………………………………………………………… 32
Power Analysis ……………………………………………………………………………………… 32
Participants……………………………………………………………………………………………. 32
Study Design…………………………………………………………………………………………. 33
Measures………………………………………………………………………………………………. 33
Procedure ……………………………………………………………………………………………… 38
CHAPTER 4 RESULTS ………………………………………………………………………….. 39
Manipulation Check……………………………………………………………………………….. 39
Primary Analyses…………………………………………………………………………………… 39
CHAPTER 5 DISCUSSION ……………………………………………………………………. 50
Limitations ………………………………………………………………………………………….. 53
Conclusion ………………………………………………………………………………………….. 56
REFERENCES …………………………………………………………………………………………… 58
APPENDIX A EXPERIMENTAL MEASURES…………………………………………… 71
APPENDIX B IRB APPROVAL………………………………………………………………… 76
APPENDIX C WRITING INSTRUCTIONS ……………………………………………….. 77
iii
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Dr. David Vogel, my major professor, is the person who I must thank first and
foremost for his constant support with my thesis and my graduate school career. I am
incredibly fortunate to have a mentor who supports me in all aspects of my professional
development and encourages me to take the research road less traveled. I am grateful to Dr.
Stephanie Madon for her enthusiasm and intellect in helping me improve the design of this
study project and, more broadly, expanding my understanding of experimental design. I
thank Dr. Fred Lorenz for his warmth and support in numerous aspects of my graduate
school career, including his help with the statistical analyses involved in this thesis.
In addition, I would like to express my gratitude to Daniel Lannin and Joseph
Hammer for their continued mentorship and friendship. I’m fortunate to have such gifted and
thoughtful role models. I would also thank Lauren, an extraordinary person and my very best
friend, for her unwavering support and comic relief. I also would like to acknowledge Laura
Smalarz for her unofficial mentorship and for listening to all of my ideas, all the way through
the end.
Finally, and mostly importantly, I would like to offer my deepest appreciation to my
family for their endless love and support. I thank my dad for encouraging me to always ask
“why”, and my mom for instilling the confidence in me to try and find out. I thank my
younger brother Dov for being my favorite and most ironic source of sanity. Last, I thank my
big brother Michael. You are my greatest inspiration. Every degree I earn is yours.
iv
ABSTRACT
The purpose of this research was to examine the immediate effects of engaging in
predominantly positively or predominantly negatively valenced thinking about one’s most
recent romantic ex-relationship and assess whether these effects are unique from thinking
about memories from a non-romantic relationship. The application of self-regulation theory
within the context of rumination and romantic relationship breakups suggests that recalling
positive memories from a relationship may make it more difficult to move on from the
relationship that ended, whereas recalling negative memories may make moving on easier.
Participants were instructed to write about a relationship memory, with experimental
manipulations of the memory valence (positive vs. negative) and relationship type (exrelationship vs. friendship). Differences in outcome measures associated with adaptive and
adverse breakup adjustment were subsequently examined. It was predicted that negatively
valenced writing would yield higher ratings of adaptive adjustment measures and lower
scores of adverse adjustment measures among participants in the ex-relationship condition,
but yield lower scores of adaptive adjustment and higher scores on adverse adjustment
among participants in the friendship condition. Results partially supported the hypotheses;
participant ratings of adaptive outcomes were higher in the negative ex-relationship condition
relative to the positive ex-relationship condition, and participants in the positive friendship
condition higher ratings compared to those in the negative friendship condition. No
meaningful differences were found with regard to adverse outcomes.
Keywords: romantic relationship breakups, thought content valence, breakups,
obsession
1
CHAPTER I
INTRODUCTION
“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking
around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.”
-Edna St. Vincent Millay, Letters (1892-1950)
After the unwelcomed end of a romantic relationship, people are oftentimes inundated
with a deep sadness and constant, obsessive yearning for their lost beloved. Unable to eat, sleep,
or think about anything else, the dissolution of a romantic relationship is one of the most
distressing events an adult can experience (Monroe, Rohde, Seeley, & Lewinsohn, 1999; Sbarra,
2006; Slotter, Gardner, & Finkel, 2010). Most individuals will go through at least one painful
romantic breakup in their lifetime (Battaglia, Richard, Datteri, and Lord, 1998) accompanied by
potential deleterious responses such as major depression, anxiety, insomnia, mood swings,
obsessive thoughts, and greater risk for suicide (see Field, 2011, for a review). Although a
burgeoning area of research interest, the extant literature predominantly focuses on describing
the negative outcomes associated with romantic breakups or identifying the factors that
predispose individuals to develop negative outcomes once a relationship ends (Davis, Shaver, &
Vernon, 2003). Yet, surprisingly little is known about what responses are adaptive in recovering
from this devastating experience. The current research intends to address this omission by
examining potentially differential effects of both positive and negative memories of a romantic
relationship on positive and negative adjustment outcomes following a breakup.
Breakup Thought Content and Valence
The end of a romantic relationship typically involves a separation from a loved one. As a
result, obsession toward the ex-partner and/or ex-relationship is common, particularly when this
2
dissolution is undesired (Field, Diego, Pelaez, Deeds, & Delgado, 2009). Intensely craving the
affection of our beloved, obsessive behaviors after a breakup are well documented such as
sending unwanted gifts, phone calls, text messages, expressions of affection (Dutton &
Winstead, 2003), and even stalking (Fremouw, Westrup, & Pennebaker, 1997; Haugaard & Seri,
2003). Whereas some of these behaviors are more extreme, some level of obsessive thinking is
typically experienced by almost all individuals experiencing a romantic relationship breakup
(Field et al., 2009).
Rumination and mental health researchers explain obsessive focus through the
application of self-regulation theory. Self-regulation theory (Carver & Scheier, 1981, 1998;
Duval & Wicklund, 1972) discusses a wide range of processes involved in self-regulatory
behavior, cognitions, and affect. Within self-regulation theory, self-focused attention is one
automatic process used to keep a person on track in pursuit of important goals by informing selfregulatory behavior. When a behavioral standard is salient, a person compares whether their
current state meets their current standard, or desired state. If the current state meets or exceeds
the standard, a person ceases self-regulation processes and self-focused attention because the
goal is met. A discrepancy between the current state and current standard can be accompanied
by feelings of distress, which has been viewed as a motivational tool in engaging in discrepancyreducing behavior (Carver & Scheier, 1981, 1998; Duval & Wicklund, 1972). Indeed, if the
current situation does not meet the standard, some theorists (Carver & Scheier, 1998) contend
that a person will either intentionally engage their behavior in order to reduce this discrepancy,
or cease pursuing their goal if the probability of achieving the current standard is low.
Researchers of rumination and mental health have extended this theory, and note that in more
personally relevant instances, such as a hurtful breakup, obsessive thinking and the related
3
distress will continue even when the probability of meeting the goal is low (Nolen-Hoeksema,
Wisco, & Lyubomirsky, 2008; Pyszczynski & Greenberg, 1987). Applied to breakups, if a
person experiences an unwelcomed end to their romantic relationship, obsessive thinking results
from the discrepancy between no longer being involved in a romantic relationship with their expartner (i.e., their current state) despite their wish to be romantically involved with their expartner (i.e., their desired state). Indeed, researchers have demonstrated that greater obsessive
thinking is associated with greater distress, confusion, tension, and depression (Collins & Clark,
1989; Davis et al., 2003; Feeney & Noller, 1992), as well as worse emotional adjustment and
greater levels of stress (Fagundes, 2012; Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007).
Beyond identifying obsessive thinking as a common, unpleasant by-product
accompanying the end of a romantic relationship, however, little advancement has been made in
the romantic relationship dissolution literature to understand the content of the thoughts
themselves. Yet, humans can alter their current psychological state through subjective thought.
For example, imagining the presence of an important individual, such as a current or ex-romantic
partner, can elicit a similar experience to their actual presence in the immediate moment
(Fitzsimons & Bargh, 2003). In a previous fMRI study identifying regions of the brain
underlying romantic love (Aron et al., 2005), by imagining their current partner, passionately-inlove participants experienced brain activity in the ventral tegmental area (VTA), similar to
receiving their partner’s affection in person. The ventral tegmental area (VTA) is the center of
the brain’s reward system, responsible for the euphoria experienced with romantic love and
cocaine, as well as the obsessive behaviors that accompany addiction. These same regions also
showed activity in a separate study where participants were injected with cocaine (Breiter et al.,
1997).
4
Another important aspect that shapes our current experience during memory recall is
content valence (Segerstrom, Stanton, Alden, & Shortridge, 2003). Imagining a positively
valenced event typically improves mood, whereas imagining a negatively valenced event
worsens it (Mather, 2006). Findings demonstrate positive memory recall as a form of emotional
regulation to enhance mood (Joormann & Siemer, 2004), and that those who tend to focus on
negative thoughts are more likely to suffer from depression (Josephson, Singer, & Salovey,
1996). Segerstrom and colleagues (2003) extended this understanding to the long-term by
examining components of repetitive thought. They identified content valence as a robust
dimension of repetitive thought, where positive and negative content valence are associated with
a positive and negative influence, respectively, on outcome variables such as affect,
physiological health, and psychological functioning. Extending beyond its influence on one’s
current, subjective state, negative or positive thought content pertaining to a specific object can
shape the appraisal or meaning that is attached to it (Segerstrom et al., 2003). This has been
demonstrated in the context of romantic relationships. In one study, participants recalling
positive autobiographical memories about their current romantic relationship experienced a
subsequent increase in the perceived warmth of their relationship (Alea & Bluck, 2007).
Similarly, couples reminiscing about a past experience involving shared laughter reported
subsequent increases in their relationship satisfaction (Bazzini, Stack, Martincin, & Davis, 2007).
Philippe, Koestner, & Lekes (2013) posit that frequent activation of couple-related memories,
and thus the emotions associated with them, can guide global attitudes and behavior toward a
romantic relationship as a form of appraisal. However, Philippe and colleagues only considered
how these effects pertainto current romantic relationships and not previous ones.
5
Despite the substantial influence of content on mental health and intimate relationships,
positive and negative thought content valence—or, more accurately, the existence of positive
content valence—after a romantic relationship ends has only recently been seriously considered.
In fact, response style theorists have tended to suggest that thought content is always negative
when an individual is distressed because both negative thought content and rumination, the most
studied form of obsessive thinking, have been shown to negatively impact adjustment (NolenHoeksema et al., 2008). As a result, romantic relationship dissolution studies typically operate
under the assumption(s) that the content of thoughts and memories after a breakup are negative
and/or pertain to the breakup itself (e.g., Boelen & Reijntjes, 2009; Fagundes, 2012; Kross et al.,
2011; Lewandowski, 2009), failing to consider the existence of positively valenced relationshiprelevant content.
Several studies have provided evidence that valence matters. A recent scale development
study demonstrated that an individual’s thoughts after a relationship breakup could contain both
positive and negative content (Brenner & Vogel, 2015). Results from this study also
demonstrated that more frequent positive thoughts about the ex-relationship were associated with
worse adjustment outcomes, while more negative thoughts about the ex-relationship was
associated with better adjustment outcomes. In an fMRI study of individuals distressed about
their breakup, when asked to think about their beloved ex-partner, participants described both
unhappy and happy memories (Fisher et al., 2010). In line with the subjective power of our
memories, particularly with individuals holding great importance to us, results demonstrated
activity related to systems of drug addiction, supporting the contention that love is an addiction,
and romantic breakups can be a form of drug withdrawal (Fisher, 2004; Fisher et al., 2010). In
another fMRI study of romantic relationship breakups, rejected-in-love participants were
6
specifically asked to focus on a sad thought. In this study participants did not show activation in
the reward systems brain region (Najib et al., 2004), and instead demonstrated deactivation in
certain areas activated in the Fisher et al. (2010) study.
Researchers have speculated why there was this difference in parts of the brain activated,
because participants in both studies thought about their ex-partner. Although they have not found
a conclusive explanation, I posit that this difference lies in the content of their thoughts and,
unlike previous studies on content valence, that positive thought content is actually maladaptive
to breakup recovery. If thinking about an important individual elicits an experience similar to
their physical presence, and if breakups really are a form of addiction, then a positively valenced
thought or memory could induce the temporary yet powerful feeling of experiencing an expartner’s affection. This could also explain why participants, who oscillated from happy to
unhappy memory recollection in Fisher and colleagues’ study, showed signs of drug high as well
as craving whereas participants in Najib and colleagues’ (2004) study, who thought about their
grief, did not show signs of addiction or craving. If an individual experiences “withdrawal” from
their ex-partner’s love, utilizing positive memories may offer relief but also serve as
unintentional reappraisal of the ex-partner.
Although Philippe and colleagues’ (2013) postulation about romantic thought content and
appraisal pertained only to those currently in a romantic relationship, predicting relationship
persistence before termination, relationship memory content may continue to influence people’s
outcomes after a relationship ends. From the self-regulation theories perspective, reinforcing
desire for an ex-partner, and thus sustaining the discrepancy between an individual’s current state
and desired state, could make it more difficult to move on and accept the breakup. In other
words, an individual who thinks about relationship-positive experiences, while feeling better in
7
the moment due to an immediate reduction in negative feelings, could actually be less willing to
accept the breakup and thus have greater difficulty moving on. Conversely, those who think
about the negative experiences, while feeling worse in the moment, may actually become more
accepting of the breakup.
This possible influence of ex-relationship memory recall on moving on from an exrelationship differs from the potential influence of other close relationship memory recall, such
as a close friendship, on moving on from an ex-relationship. Though potentially intimate and
meaningful, memories from a friendship are not about the ex-relationship and, therefore, do not
directly address the current state-desired state discrepancy. Furthermore, unlike positive exrelationship memories, thinking about a positive friendship experience would not be followed by
being met with a discrepant reality from the subject of their thoughts. In fact, as social support
contributes to adaptive coping in stressful events (Shulman, 1993), thinking about a positive
friendship memory may actually relate to positively to adjustment outcomes. As such, one might
expect that an individual who thinks about a positive friendship memory during a difficult time,
such as after a breakup, would feel better in the moment and also experience better adjustment to
their breakup. Similarly, thinking about a negative memory from a friendship would likely
make an individual feel worse in the moment and instead be maladaptive toward breakup
recovery.
Current Study
While a heartbroken person does not have the drug they crave in the purest form (i.e.,
love from their ex-partner), they do have a surplus of a “counterfeit” form: their memories. The
obsessive nature of positive thoughts, for example, may make it difficult to move on from a
beloved ex-partner particularly if the thinking about and, in turn, reappraisal, of the ex-
8
relationship leads one to hold on to the relationship. In Fisher and colleagues’ (2010) study,
participants relived happy and sad experiences from the relationship, eliciting the reward,
craving, and grief evident in the fMRI; however, when participants in another study were
instructed to describe a sad thought, which is potentially more of a process-type thought as
opposed to reliving a specific memory, results indicated deactivations in these brain regions
(Najib et al., 2004). I contend that these drastically different findings between each study
resulted from drastically different thought content in their participants.
Recently, Brenner & Vogel (2015) demonstrated the tendency for individuals to
reminisce about positive and negative thoughts involving their ex-relationship, and point to
potentially differing outcomes based on the degree to which one thinks about positively and
negatively valenced relationship thought content in general. Immediate, state-induced responses,
however, have not yet been explored. In the current experimental study, I intended to fill this gap
in the literature by examining the immediate influence of positive and negative thought content
on mood and recovery from romantic relationship dissolution. Participants were randomly
assigned to one of four conditions, writing about either: positively valenced thoughts about an
ex-relationship, negatively valenced thoughts about an ex-relationship, positively valenced
thoughts about a friendship, or negatively valenced thoughts about a friendship. The friendship
condition was included in order to parse out whether observed patterns between positive versus
negative valence memory conditions would be the due to valence effects in general or due to
valence effects in the context of ex-relationship memories specifically. Following this writing
task, participants indicated their current affect (Watson, Clark, & Tellegen, 1988), self-concept
clarity (Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007), and adjustment to the breakup (Saffrey & Ehrenberg,
2007) using self-report measures.
9
It was hypothesized that participants who wrote about positively valenced thoughts
regarding their ex-relationship would experience less rediscovery of self-concept and positive
adjustment, and greater loss of self-concept and negative adjust post-writing compared to those
who wrote about negatively valenced ex-relationship thought content. Meanwhile, the opposite
influence was hypothesized for those who wrote about a friendship; participants who wrote about
positively valenced thoughts about a friendship were expected to experience greater rediscovery
of self-concept and positive adjustment, and less loss of self-concept and negative adjustment
post-writing compared to those who wrote about negatively valenced ex-relationship thought
content. Moreover, it was hypothesized that participants who wrote about positively valenced
thoughts, regardless of relationship type would experience greater positive affect and less
negative affect post-writing compared to those who wrote about negatively valenced exrelationship thought content. If valence influences breakup-related outcomes in opposite
directions, this would be the strongest evidence for the notion of the unique effect of content
valence. Namely, that within the context of ex-romantic relationships, positively valenced
thoughts are more detrimental and less beneficial for mental health and well-being compared
with negatively valenced thoughts.
10
CHAPTER 2
LITERATURE REVIEW
Most adults experience a romantic relationship breakup at least once in their lifetime
(Battaglia et al., 1998), and research has demonstrated the potentially devastating impact on
one’s physical and emotional health (Kloss & Lisman, 2002; Monroe et al.,1999; Sbarra, 2006;
Slotter et al., 2010). Research thus far has predominantly sought to identify specific symptoms
(i.e., sleep disturbance, depression, anxiety) or characteristics (i.e., attachment style, level of
emotional involvement) associated with greater distress. However, almost no attention has
focused on understanding individual responses to a breakup and how these responses can
mitigate or exacerbate this distress or help us to move on. One response to a negative event that
individuals typically engage in is an obsessive focus on aspects related to the negative event.
Indeed, a common breakup response is to obsessively think about the ex-relationship, and greater
obsession is linked to worse outcomes (Field et al., 2009; Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007).
Researchers have examined adaptive and maladaptive features of obsessive thinking in general;
however, different features of this obsessive focus, such as positive and negative content valence,
have not been examined in the context of romantic relationship breakups. The goal of this
research is to examine this possibility that different features can lead to different outcomes.
As this is a newer area of research, the hypotheses were formulated through integration of
interdisciplinary research on aspects of breakups, love, obsession, and valence of thought.
Accordingly, to present the hypotheses and design of the current study in a coherent manner, the
chapter first reviews the literature in each of four these domains separately and concludes by
connecting them to an unified, overarching idea. Therefore, the first topic I will review involves
the deleterious outcomes associated with the end of a romantic relationship. The second area of
11
the review covers the current theories regarding the experience of falling in love and going
through a romantic breakup. Third, I will review the extant literature on obsession and obsessive
thoughts about an ex-partner, the latter of which is a common presentation after an unwanted
romantic relationship breakup (Langhinrichsen-Rohling, Palarea, Cohen, & Rohling, 2000;
Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007). Finally, I will discuss the subjective influence of the content
valence of one’s thoughts and how this may affect recovery from a romantic relationship
breakup.
Romantic Relationship Outcomes
The dissolution of a romantic relationship is one of the most distressing events an adult
can experience, associated with an array of outcomes related to negative adjustment and poor
mental health. People typically experience feelings of hurt, frustration and loneliness, (Choo,
Levine, & Hatfield, 1996; Sprecher, 1994), mood swings (Sbarra & Emery, 2005), trouble
sleeping, intrusive thoughts (Field et al., 2009), as well as depression and anxiety (Boelen &
Reijntjes, 2009). Furthermore, a romantic relationship breakup is predictive of the onset of Major
Depressive Disorder (MDD). Monroe et al. (1999) conducted a longitudinal study with two time
points, involving 1,470 adolescents with data collected approximately 13.8 months apart.
Through interviews and assessment, participants were evaluated for depression and other
diagnoses. Participants also filled out a survey assessing demographic variables, life stress
measures, and depressive symptoms. Analyses revealed that a recent romantic relationship
breakup predicted the first onset of Major Depressive Disorder over and above the presentation
of subclinical depression at Time 1, and this finding was consistent across sex.
Although a less studied research area empirically, the detrimental experience of a
romantic relationship breakup is widely recognized by the everyday individual. In a large phone
12
survey of traumatic events, relationship dissolution was one of the most common ‘‘worst
events’’ offered (Frazier & Hurliman, 2001). Moreover, in writing studies about traumatic
events, many participants choose to write about relationship dissolution or difficulties when
given the option (e.g., Park & Blumberg, 2002; Pennebaker & Beall, 1986; Ullrich &
Lutgendorf, 2002). In one study, relationship problems/dissolution was the second most-chosen
topic, preceded only by death of a loved one, and mentioned by up to 25% of participants (Kloss
& Lisman, 2002).
While identifying the negative outcomes associated with romantic breakups has been the
focus of much of the extant literature, several studies have also focused on identifying preexisting risk factors for developing these negative outcomes. For example, several studies have
examined the influence of attachment style, and findings indicate that greater attachment anxiety
is predictive of post-dissolution distress, depression, and complicated grief (Boelen & Reijntjes,
2009; Davis et al., 2003; Fagundes, 2012; Perrier, Boucher, Etchegary, Sadava, & Molnar,
2010). Moreover, individual reports of higher relationship satisfaction (Sprecher, Felmlee, Metts,
Fehr, & Vanni, 1998), commitment (Boelen & Reijntjes, 2009), and self-expansion within the
relationship (Lewandowski, Aron, Bassis, & Kunak, 2006) are associated with greater breakup
distress. In the Field et al. (2009) study, greater breakup distress was present for participants who
did not initiate the breakup, for whom the breakup was sudden and unexpected, who felt rejected,
who felt betrayed, and who were in a longer relationship. However, results on the
rejecter/rejected status are mixed; while a the majority of studies indicate that the individual who
did not end the relationship typically experiences significantly greater distress after a relationship
ends (e.g., Boelen & Reintjes, 2009; Collins & Clark, 1989; Perilloux & Buss, 2008), others
found that this did not significantly impact on distress (Tashiro & Frazier, 2003) or recovery
13
(Sbarra, 2006) after relationship ends. Researchers have also identified change to the selfconcept as an important, plausible outcome after the end of a romantic relationship
(Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007). Namely, the end of a romantic relationship can weaken one’s
self-assurance and understanding of their sense of self, who they are as a person. In a
longitudinal study, college freshman who recently experienced a romantic relationship breakup
reported less clarity in their self-concept, and this diminished clarity predicted greater emotional
distress (Slotter et al., 2010).
Although these factors are predictive of distress after a romantic relationship ends, most
are present before or during the relationship breakup. Surprisingly little is known about the
variability within responses that an individual can control once the breakup has occurred, nor
how these responses may vary in the degree to which they are adaptive and maladaptive in
recovering from this devastating experience. The most robust predictor of decreased distress
after a breakup appears to be time (e.g., Field et al., 2009, Fisher et al., 2010; Knox, Zusman,
Kaluzny, & Cooper, 2000; Le, Dove, Agnew, Korn, & Mutso, 2010; Moller, Fouladi, McCarthy,
& Hatch, 2003). To better understand how responses may be adaptive or maladaptive, it is
important to know the theoretical underpinnings of how love and romantic relationship
dissolution may function, which I present in the subsequent section.
Love and Dissolution Theories
Among the existing literature on romantic relationship breakups, two perspectives have
emerged to explain the experience of emotional distress after romantic relationship dissolution.
As a romantic relationships breakup typically involves a stark separation from a loved one, the
first theory views heartbreak as a form of bereavement (Najib et al., 2004; Field, 2011). Indeed,
individuals suffering from a breakup experience symptoms similar to the grieving widow or
14
widower such as depression, intrusive thoughts, sleep disturbances, and immune dysfunction
(Davis et al., 2003; Field et al., 2009; Prigerson & Jacobs, 2001). To examine the bereavement
parallel between breakups and bereavement, Field et al. (2009) transformed the widely used
Inventory Complicated Grief (ICG; Prigerson et al., 1995) which measures bereavement distress,
to create a Breakup Distress Scale (BDS; Field et al., 2009). In a sample of 192 college students,
those with higher breakup distress also reported greater levels of depression, anxiety, sleep
disturbances, intrusive thoughts, and difficulty controlling their intrusive thoughts. Although
other studies have not tested this conceptualization directly, other studies on breakups have
operated under this grief framework (e.g., Boelen & Reijntjes, 2009; Fagundes, 2012;
Langhinrichsen-Rohling et al., 2000).
The second perspective on romantic breakups is based on theories about love; namely,
that romantic love is form of addiction (Fisher, 2004; Fisher et al., 2010; Peele and Brodsky,
1975). This stems from the analogous characteristics found in those in love and those with a drug
addiction. When in love, people commonly experience euphoria, increased energy, obsessive
thoughts, intense focus on the partner, loss of appetite, and emotional dependence (GriffinShelley, 1991; Halpern, 1982; Liebowitz, 1983; Mellody et al., 1992; Peele and Brodsky, 1975;
Schaef 1989; Tennov, 1979). Moreover, in fMRI studies of romantic love, areas of the brain
associated with cocaine high and craving were also affected by sex, love, and attachment. For
example, when passionately-in-love participants were instructed to think of their romantic
partner, researchers found the same strong correlates in specific brain activity to those injected
with cocaine (Aron et al., 2005; Breiter et. al., 1997). One of these regions, the ventral tegmental
area (VTA), is the center of the brain’s reward system responsible for the euphoria experienced
with romantic love and cocaine, as well as the obsessive behaviors that accompany addiction.
15
Activation in the VTA for passionately in love individuals has been consistent across cultures,
namely, in participants from the United States (Ortigue et al., 2007), the United Kingdom
(Bartels & Zeki, 2000), and China (Xu et al., 2011). In a classic study by Olds and Milner
(1954), rats with unlimited access to food and a lever that provided electrical stimulation to their
VTA pushed the lever repeatedly until collapsing from starvation.
Viewing romantic love as a form of addiction and requited love as a drug high, the
second theory on romantic breakups postulates that going through an unwanted romantic breakup
is a form of drug withdrawal (Fisher et al., 2010). This addresses the symptoms overlapping with
bereavement as well as those unaccounted for such as mood swings, obsessive behavior, risktaking, and loss of self-control (Dutton & Winstead, 2003; Sbarra & Emery, 2005). Fisher and
colleagues (2010) conducted an fMRI study of persons who were recently broken up with and
still in love with their ex-partner. The results demonstrated activity in the areas of the brain that
mediate motivation and reward (i.e., increased activity in the midbrain area of the VTA and
striatum), as seen in studies of individuals passionately in love with their partner (e.g., Aron et
al., 2005; Bartels & Zeki, 2000; Ortigue, Bianchi-Demicheli, Hamilton, & Grafton, 2007; Xu et
al., 2011). Further, rejected-in-love individuals also demonstrated activity in the nucleus
accumbens and orbitofrontal/prefrontal cortex, the same regions underlying various drug
addictions such as cocaine (Risinger et al., 2005; Volkow et al., 2006). In addition to increased
activity in the VTA, an fMRI study of rejected-in-love participants found activity similar to
individuals withdrawing from stimulant drugs (Fisher et al., 2010). In other words, while rejected
and romantically involved samples showed signs of addiction, the rejected-in-love participants
also showed signs of withdrawal. As mentioned earlier, one of the most pervasive characteristics
of addiction, obsession, is also one of the areas of focus within the formulation of this study.
16
Obsession
Obsessive behaviors demonstrate the overwhelming magnitude and power of intrusive,
obsessive thoughts that are common after a romantic relationship breakup. Although we may like
to believe that mankind possesses a level of control and sophistication beyond the obsessive
lever-pushing mice observed by Olds & Milner (1954), we too engage in corresponding
behaviors with more intrusive manifestations. Obsessive behaviors after a breakup vary in
severity and frequency (Langhinrichsen-Rohling, Palarea, Cohen, & Rohling, 2000), including
examples such as sending unwanted gifts, phone calls, text messages, and expressions of
affection (Dutton & Winstead, 2003). In a collegiate sample, 89% of respondents indicated that a
previous romantic partner engaged in at least one unwanted pursuit behavior after the
relationship ended (Langhinrichsen-Rohling et al., 2000). Stalking is a more extreme yet not
uncommon pursuit behavior after a breakup. In one study, 55% of female and 25% of male
stalking victims indicated that their stalker was an ex-partner from a serious relationship
(Fremouw et al., 1997) and 21% in another study stated they had been the targets of intrusive
contact after they ended a relationship (Haugaard & Seri, 2004). This obsessive behavior also
translates to social networking websites, such as Facebook, where individuals commonly
monitor their ex-partner and, on the more extreme end, use Facebook to attempt to reconnect
(Chaulk & Jones, 2011; Marshall, 2012). For example, in a survey of 1,022 undergraduate
students in Canada, 82% of participants reported viewing pictures that their ex-partner posted
and/or pictures of their ex-partner that had been posted by others, 60% read their ex-partner’s
wall conversations (including posts and replies), and 31% reported using Facebook to “keep
tabs” on their ex-partner. With regard to actual contact, 63% reportedly sent their ex-partner
messages, 58% posted on their Facebook page, and 7% have actually showed up to events that
17
their ex-partner indicated via Facebook that they would be attending. Participants also used
Facebook to stalk and even communicated with their ex-partner’s friends and family (Chaulk &
Jones, 2011). Moreover, those who use Facebook to monitor ex-romantic partners are more
likely to engage in unwanted physical pursuit behaviors (Lyndon, Bonds-Raacke, & Cratty,
2011).
Obsessive behaviors are external manifestations of a very common internal experience
after the end of a romantic relationship: obsessive thought about an ex-relationship (Collins &
Clark, 1989; Field et al., 2009). As such, understanding the nature of obsessive thoughts after the
end of a romantic relationship has become a more recent area of interest for dissolution
researchers hoping to understand the broader population or to address the more extreme cases
(Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007). In the extant literature, obsessively thinking about a negative
event has also been referred to as rumination. Specifically, response styles theory (NolenHoeksema, 1991) defines rumination as a maladaptive response to a negative event, comprised
of obsessive focus on the symptoms, causes, and consequences of one’s distress. The content of
ruminative thought is assumed to be predominantly negative (Nolen-Hoeksema et al., 2008).
Rumination is one of the most widely studied processes of obsessive, repetitive thinking, and
extensive research demonstrates a significant association between rumination and depression
(see Aldao, Nolen-Hoeksema, & Schweizer, 2010, for review). Namely, those who ruminate on a
regular basis are more likely to be depressed, and the more that currently depressed individuals
ruminate about their distress, the more likely they are to stay that way (Mor & Winquist, 2002).
Furthermore, rumination is linked to myriad negative outcomes, even after controlling for
depression, such as hopelessness, low self-esteem, dysfunctional attitudes, pessimism, reduction
in social support, and dependency (Lam, Schuck, Smith, Farmer, & Checkley, 2003; Nolen-
18
Hoeksema, Parker, & Larson, 1994; Nolen-Hoeksema, Larson, & Grayson, 1999; Roberts,
Gilboa, & Gotlib, 1998). Self-regulation theories (Carver & Scheier, 1998; Duval & Wicklund,
1972; Martin & Tesser, 1996; Pyszczynski & Greenberg, 1987) contend that rumination results
from perceived discrepancies between one’s current state and their desired state. Moreover,
researchers contend that this obsessive focus can be adaptive when it leads to problem solving or
letting go of impossible goals, yet maladaptive when the individual engages in neither of these
and remains in a state of obsessively focusing on their discrepancies.
Since the introduction of response styles theory, researchers have identified another
obsessive thought process of reflection, or curious and intellectual examination of the self and
events, as a construct distinct from rumination (Trapnell & Campbell, 1999). Although
rumination and reflection are both associated with greater distress in the short-term, longitudinal
analyses indicate that reflection may improve well-being over time (Segerstrom et al., 2003). In
other words, obsessively thinking about the cause and state of one’s despair is generally
maladaptive in the short- and long-term, whereas obsessive reflection, though painful in the
immediate setting, may be beneficial for recovery from a hurtful experience in the long-term.
Although obsessive thinking is common after the end of a romantic relationship, only a
few studies have examined the relationship between this obsessive thinking and breakup-relevant
outcomes. Even with different measures of obsessively thinking about an ex-relationship (e.g.,
relationship preoccupation, intrusive thoughts, rumination), findings are consistent: greater time
spent thinking about an ex-partner relates to higher levels of distress, worse adjustment, more
confusion, tension, and depression (Collins & Clark, 1989; Fagundes, 2012; Feeney & Noller,
1992; Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007). In the nascent studies examining ex-relationship obsession
Collins and Clark (1989) and Davis et al. (2003) found that those who did not end the
19
relationship experienced higher levels of intrusive thoughts and preoccupied thinking about their
ex-partner. In another study of 231 college students, relationship preoccupation partially
mediated the relationship between attachment styles and breakup adjustment (Saffrey &
Ehrenberg). Finally, Fagundes (2012) found an association between relationship reflection and
negative emotional adjustment. In sum, the more that an individual is generally thinking about
their ex-partner, the worse off they appear to be in recovering from their breakup. While general
amount of time spent thinking about an ex-partner has been linked to pertinent adjustment
outcomes, the content of those thought may provide a more nuanced effect. Next, I will talk
about different characteristics of thought content and their subjective influences in the short and
long term.
Thought Content Valence
Our thoughts and memories hold a powerful, multifaceted influence on people’s current
psychological state, where people are able to experience an envisioned incident as if it were
occurring in the present moment (Rasmussen & Bernsten, 2013; Tulving, 2002). Different
characteristics influence the subjective strength of people’s thoughts. For example, the more
important an individual is to a person, the more that person will experience their imagined
presence as occurring in the present moment (Fitzsimons & Bargh, 2003). Master et al. (2009)
tested this notion in the context of romantic relationships. Twenty-five women in long-term
heterosexual relationships participated in a study where pain was induced equally in seven study
conditions. The pain was induced while, depending on the current condition, the participant
either (a) held the hand of the partner, (b) held the hand of a male stranger, (c) held an object, (d)
viewed the partner’s photograph on a computer screen, (e) viewed photographs of a male
stranger (f) viewed photographs of an object (a chair), or (g) viewed a fixation crosshair (no
20
manipulation). Results support the notion that the imagined presence of an important individual
elicits an experience similar to their actual presence. Namely, participants experienced
significant attenuation of physically induced pain when viewing a picture of their romantic
partner equal to the pain reduced while holding their partner’s hand, with the partner-photograph
conditions receiving marginally lower ratings. Moreover, results also underscored the power of a
loved one’s support. Participants reported lower pain ratings when holding their partner’s hand
than when holding an object or holding a stranger’s hand. Similarly, viewing a picture of their
partner led to lower pain ratings than when viewing a photograph of an object or viewing
photographs of a stranger. The same effects were not present when these conditions were
employed with a complete stranger or an object.
This impact can be observed in thoughts and memories taking place at different points in
time (Berntsen & Bohn, 2010; D’Argembeau & Van der Linden, 2004; Rasmussen & Bernsten,
2013). While Master et al.’s (2009) study examined present thinking about an ex-partner, a
powerful memory can project itself onto the present (Tulving, 2002; Wheeler, Stuss, & Tulving,
1997). For example, Kross et al. (2011) conducted study to compare imagined social pain from
the past with physical pain in the present. Forty participants who recently experienced an
unwanted romantic relationship end engaged in tasks of social rejection and tasks of physical
pain. Specifically, to manipulate social rejections, participants either “relived” an unwanted
romantic relationship breakup by viewing a photograph of their ex-partner while thinking about
their rejection experience, or viewed a photograph of their friend of the same sex as their expartner and thought about a positive experience they shared with that friend. Physical pain was
manipulated by participants receiving a painful or non-painful thermal stimulation on their left
forearm. Participants reported greater distress when reliving their breakup experience compared
21
to a positive experience with a friend, as well as when receiving the painful versus non-painful
thermal stimulation. Moreover, the effect sizes for the social and physical pain conditions imply
that the subjective experiences were equally intense. Furthermore, when thinking about the
breakup, brain imagining demonstrated greater activity in the same regions activated during firsthand experience of both social exclusion and physical pain (Eisenberger, 2012).
Although these studies highlighted different aspects of thoughts that can impact our
current state, they also underscore a shared feature that can significantly influence our current
state: content valence. Indeed, content valence is an integral determinant of the mood elicited by
our thoughts. Moreover, content valence surrounding an attitude-object can also influence our
perceptions of the attitude object in the immediate moment. For example, in one study (Alea &
Bluck, 2007), 179 adults in long-term relationships were asked to recall two positive
autobiographical memories from their romantic relationship. Without their partner being present,
simply recalling these two memories led to an increase in reported positive affect and perceived
warmth in their romantic relationship.
The aforementioned studies underscore the state-based influence of our thoughts.
Segerstrom and colleagues (2003) extended this understanding to our general state by examining
components of repetitive thought in the long-term. They identified content valence as a robust
dimension of repetitive thought, distinct from the process component captured by rumination and
reflection. That is, rumination and reflection denote the purpose of repetitive thinking (e.g., to
gain understanding, to solve problems), while content valence pertains to the thoughts within a
ruminative or reflective process. Positive and negative content valence of repetitive thoughts is
associated with a corresponding influence on outcome variables such as affect, physiological
health, and psychological functioning (Kubzansky et al. 1997; Roach, Salt, & Segerstrom, 2010;
22
Segerstrom et al., 2003). That is, positive content valence promotes positive affect, and improved
physiological health and psychological function while negative content valence worsens them.
While there appears to be a personality-linked component to the degree that people think about
positively and negatively valenced thoughts, there is also evidence for variability in this domain.
Namely, individuals can substantially shift the amount of positively and negatively valenced
thought that they engage in, and this may be more likely to happen when facing stressful
situations (Roach et al., 2010).
To understand the impact of these emotion-laden memories over time, one line of
research examined the purpose of episodic memories and how these memories influenced
thoughts, feelings, and behavior on a day-to-day basis (Bluck, 2003; Pillemer, 2001; Robinson,
1986). Researchers identified three functions: social, self, and directive function (Bluck, Alea,
Habermas, & Rubin, 2005). The social function refers to the ways in which people engage their
memories in conversation with others. The self-function refers to the way that people use their
memories to form a coherent sense of self over time. The directive function. The directive
function, which denotes how memories influence thoughts, feelings, and behavior (Pillemer,
1998, 2003), is the most prominent of the three functions and most directly related to decisionmaking and romantic relationships (Philippe et al., 2013). The directive function can occur
automatically without the individual’s awareness of its influence (Kuwabara & Pillemer, 2010;
Philippe, Koestner, Beaulieu-Pelletier, Lecours, & Lekes, 2012, Study 1), and emotional reexperiencing can be an important component to this function (Alea & Bluck, 2007). For
example, when deciding whether or not to eat at a particular restaurant, a person may remember
a positive experience that occurred at the restuarant there in the past, and thus be more likely to
decide to eat there.
23
Repetitive negative or positive thought content pertaining to a specific event can shape
the appraisal or meaning we attach to it (Segerstrom et al., 2003). Philippe and colleagues (2013,
Study 4) examined the directive function of memories over time in a one-year longitudinal study
of 196 undergraduate and graduate students in a romantic relationship. A cross-lag panel analysis
demonstrated that the content of couple-related memories influence relationship outcomes over
time. The researchers found that the type of memory content at Time 1 predicted relationship
perseverance or dissolution at Time 2. Moreover, they found a reciprocal relationship where
higher relationship quality predicted more satisfying memory recall. In other words, relational
outcomes predict the couple memories recalled, while couple memories recalled also influence
relational outcomes (Philippe et al., 2013). While other researchers examining the directive
function with romantic relationship outcomes in the immediate moment (Alea & Bluck, 2007;
Bazzini et al., 2007), this study introduced the importance of this this over time. Moreover,
Philippe and colleagues (2013) conclude that frequent activation of couple-related memories can
influence how one perceives their current romantic relationship relationship over time. Though
they did not consider this in the scope of previous romantic relationships, I posit that this applies
to our view of romantic relationships in the past as well, with important implications for how we
respond to breakups.
In essence, Philippe et al. (2013) implied that by recalling emotion-laden memories,
people could unintentionally reappraise a romantic relationship over time. Although valence has
been omitted from previous research with breakups, positive or negative valence repeatedly
applied to a previous romantic relationship could significantly differ the course of recovery.
From a self-regulation theorist perspective, as obsessive thinking and distress result from the
discrepancy between one’s current state and their desired state, negatively reappraising the ex-
24
relationship to seem less appealing would be adaptive; desiring the partner less would more
closely match the current state of not being with the ex-partner. In other words, if a person alters
their view of their goal to undesirable, the discrepancy would be diminished, along with the
amount of obsessive thinking and presenting distress. However, maintaining or increasing the
perceived desirability toward an unattainable state will only perseverate and/or exacerbate this
distress. In terms of a previous romantic relationship, if an individual reappraises their exrelationship as less and less desirable, then their current state (i.e., not in the relationship) will
match their desired state, and they will move toward acceptance. Conversely, if an individual
continues to evaluate their ex-relationship in a positive light, they will only struggle to accept the
breakup, maintaining the distress and obsession accompanying this dissonance. Furthermore,
recalling low-closure memories elicits more intense emotion than high-closure memories, and
thinking about a low-closure memory incites an urge to repeat a task in order to achieve a
thwarted goal (Beike & Wirth-Beaumont, 2005; Beike, Adams, & Wirth-Beaumont, 2007).
Thus, if the person does not have closure on their relationship and thus being in their exrelationship is their “goal”, then recalling memories, particularly those that reinforce the goal
itself, will perpetuate that desire.
Beyond studies examining the magnitude of relationship preoccupation, little effort has
been made to delineate style or content of the thoughts themselves. That is, researchers have
hardly examined if there are differential outcomes related to the way that we think about an exrelationship after a breakup. While Saffrey and Ehrenberg (2007) examined relationship
preoccupation, they also examined participants’ general tendencies (i.e., not in the context of
their romantic breakup) to ruminate and reflect after experiencing a negative event. Results
indicated that brooding (rumination) was uniquely linked to worse adjustment and reflection was
25
uniquely linked to better adjustment. As mentioned earlier, Fagundes (2012) did examine
reflection in the context of romantic relationships, and results demonstrated that reflection was
not adaptive in the short-term; however, the study did not include the other subscale measure for
rumination, which is typically measured concurrently. Either way, these studies shed light on the
potential for characteristics of obsessive thought beyond the sheer magnitude to influence
adjustment outcomes. Content valence of these ex-relationship thoughts has also been
overlooked.
One study (Lewandowski, 2009) did assess valence as a manipulation of adjustment
among individuals who experienced a romantic relationship breakup in the past six months. After
filling out a pre-test survey that measured positive and negative emotions experienced since the
breakup, participants (n=87) wrote for 20 minutes about either positive or negative thoughts
about the aftermath of their breakup once per day for three days. Interestingly, findings were
mixed. Consistent with the current discussion, participants in the positive condition reported
experiencing more positive emotion since the breakup compared to those in the negative
condition. Yet no differences in negative emotion were reported between conditions. The
researchers then examined these effects controlling for initiator status. Once controlled for, there
was no difference in positive emotion between conditions unless the breakup was mutual. Those
in the neutral and negative conditions only increased in positive emotion if the participant
initiated the breakup. However, there were several limitations that preclude its application to the
current study. For example, participants returned for a post-test survey and debriefing two days
after they completed the third writing activity. Therefore, any immediate effects may have been
overcome by any differently valenced thoughts that the individual may have been engaging in
independently since the final writing activity. Furthermore, the study mainly looked at positive
26
and negative valence surrounding the breakup as opposed to the relationship itself. The
instructions changed each day, but the instructed valence was consistent. After writing about the
relationship that ended (Day 1), participants in the non-neutral conditions were instructed to “let
go and write about your deepest thoughts and (positive/ negative) feelings about aftermath of the
breakup” either “a few days after it happened” (Day 2; Lewandowski, 2009, p.25) or “a few
weeks after it happened” (Day 3; Lewandowski, 2009, p.25). An additional potential problem
here is that, in thinking about the aftermath of the breakup, people may have generated thoughts
outside of the relationship. For example, a person may highlight the support they received from
friends. Although they may feel closer to their friends, this may or may not make an individual
feel better about the relationship ending itself.
In other words, while this study is the first to include thought content valence in a
romantic relationship study, the methodology differentiates the study from the one that is
currently being proposed. The participants did not respond to the outcome measures immediately
after the intervention was completed. The valence was mainly applied to the breakup and not the
relationship itself. Moreover, the content did not necessarily involve the actual romantic
relationship that ended. Although the aforementioned reasons limit the conclusions that can be
drawn from these findings, the different results when controlling for initiator status does
underscore the role it can play in studies of this nature. This study contributes to the literature on
relationship thoughts and breakups by considering features of thoughts independent from the
presence of obsessive thoughts in one’s life after a breakup (i.e., positive and negative valence),
and demonstrating the potential influence of initiator status in the breakup. However, their
methods approach the notion of valence in a less related fashion to the study being proposed.
27
Several recent studies have provided evidence that valence matters. A recent scale
development study demonstrated that an individual’s thoughts after a relationship breakup could
contain both positive and negative content. Brenner and Vogel (2015) developed the Positive and
Negative Ex-Relationship Thought (PANERT) scale to measure positively and negatively
valenced ex-relationship thoughts. The positively and negatively valenced items loaded as two
distinct factors coinciding with positively valenced and negatively valenced thought content.
Both constructs were uniquely associated with greater negative emotional adjustment, breakup
distress, and loss of self-concept. Further, they were associated with other constructs in opposite
directions. More frequent positive thoughts regarding the ex-partner and/or ex-relationship was
uniquely associated greater levels of depression, lower rediscovery of self-concept, and lower
positive adjustment. Conversely, negative thoughts about the ex-partner uniquely predicted
greater rediscovery of self-concept, more positive adjustment, and had no statistically significant
association with depression. In other words, both positive valence account for unique variance in
outcomes pertinent to romantic relationship breakups and also demonstrate unique patterns in the
way that they relate to these outcomes.
This notion of two distinct types of thought content is also supported by research with
rejected-in-love individuals who were asked to think about their beloved ex-partner with no
specific instruction on thought content valence (Fisher et al., 2010). Fisher et al.’s (2010) report
of what participants thought about during the fMRI scan portrayed the fluctuation in content
valence within participants thinking about their ex-partner:
“During the prescanning interview, the interviewer (HEF) and participant discussed
events that the participant might think about while looking at each photograph…the
participants started with their feelings of disappointment and their list of injustices…[but]
expressed both negative and positive feelings…In the postscanning interview, individuals
showed mixed expressions of romantic love, agitation, anger, and despair. Most
recounted both happy and unhappy memories.” (p. 53, Fisher et al., 2010)
28
Interestingly, these differing thought contents may have led to different activations of the
brain. Fischer et al. (2010) conducted fMRI scans of these individuals while they were thinking
about their ex (i.e., both happy and unhappy memories). In other words, the rejected-in-love
participants showed signs of both experiencing drug highs and withdrawal. However, as noted
above, in this study participants where given no instructions as what aspects of the relationship to
think about and identified both positive and negative aspects to remember. In another fMRI
study of romantic relationship breakups (Najib et al., 2004), rejected-in-love participants were
specifically instructed to describe a “sad thought about their lover on which they had been
ruminating” (p. 2246). In this study participants did not show activation in the reward systems
brain region, and even showed deactivation in certain areas activated in the Fisher et al. (2010)
study. Although researchers have speculated why this discrepancy occurred, they have not found
a conclusive explanation. I posit that this difference lies in the content of their thoughts and,
unlike previous studies on content valence, that positive thought content is actually maladaptive
to breakup recovery. If thinking about an important individual elicits an experience similar to
their physical presence, and if breakups really are a form of addiction, then a positively valenced
thought or memory could induce the temporary yet powerful feeling of experiencing an expartner’s affection. This could also explain why participants, who oscillated from happy to
unhappy memory recollection in Fisher and colleagues’ study, showed signs of drug high as well
as craving whereas participants in Najib and colleagues’ (2004) study, who thought about their
grief, did not show signs of addiction or craving. If an individual experiences “withdrawal” from
their ex-partner’s love, utilizing positive memories may offer relief but also serve as
unintentional reappraisal of the ex-partner.
29
The Current Study
Although previous research demonstrated that people obsessively think about aspects of
their ex-relationship after a breakup, researchers have rarely considered the features of these
thoughts—what they think about their ex-relationship, how they think about their exrelationship—as an area that may lead to varied paces of recovery from a romantic breakup.
Consider thought content valence, for example. If two individuals, both terribly and equally
devastated over their romantic relationship breakup, obsessively think about their ex-relationship
but one predominately thinks about what they love and miss from their ex-relationship and the
other thinks about all of the aggravating aspects of the relationship, would they recover at the
same rate? That question cannot be answered because, prior to this study, it has not yet been
asked. By considering potential differences in outcomes related to how individuals think about
an ex-relationship, this line of research could inform the development of interventions aimed at
helping individuals experiencing a distressing romantic breakup. Thus, the goal of this study is to
examine how the valence of memories specific to an ex-relationship may differentially impact
immediate ratings of affect and outcomes related to moving on.
The current experimental study featured a 2 (Valence: Positive versus Negative) x 2
(Relationship type: Ex-relationship versus Friendship) between-subjects design. Participants
engaged in a writing activity where, depending on the condition, they were instructed to write
about either positive or negative memories about their most recent ex-relationship or a current
friendship. Participants then responded to measures related to affect, self-concept, and breakup
adjustment. The friendship condition was included in order to parse out whether any observed
patterns would be the due to valence effects in general or due to valence effects within the
specific context of ex-relationship memories.
30
Reminding oneself of the positive aspects of a relationship may make it more difficult to
move on from the relationship, whereas reminding oneself of the negative aspects of a
relationship may be reassuring toward the fact that the relationship is over. However, the
influence of valence with friendship-related thoughts may actually have the opposite impact on
breakup-related outcomes expected with those about ex-relationship. Supportive friendships can
positively influence mental health and self-esteem (Keefe & Berndt, 2006), and social support is
important in coping with difficult life events (Shin & Ryan, 2012) including romantic
relationship breakups (Locker, McIntosh, Hackney, Wilson & Wiegand, 2010). As our thoughts
can impact our current moment experience, positively valenced memories of a friendship could
reinforce this social support and make one feel less alone. Conversely, thinking about negative
memories from a friendship may lead one to feel more isolated. Therefore, a person who thinks
about positively valenced friendship memories would likely experience this as beneficial
compared to someone who thinks about negatively valenced friendship memories.
As discussed previously, valence of thought is generally linked to congruent affect.
Therefore, one would expect that affect-congruence is present across relationship types.
However, an exception to this may be present for ex-relationships as the relationship is over and
thus positive memories could lead one to stay attached to something they cannot have resulting
in a decreased ability to move on and increased distress. If valenced thoughts about an exrelationship do influence breakup-related outcomes in opposite directions as expected, this would
provide clear evidence that within the context of romantic relationships that have ended, positive
valenced thoughts are more detrimental and less beneficial to mental health and well-being than
negatively valenced thoughts.
31
Research Hypotheses
Hypothesis 1: Adaptive Outcomes
A two-way interaction of valence (positive versus negative) and relationship type (exrelationship versus friendship) was predicted with regard to outcomes related to moving on.
Specifically, among participants who wrote about an ex-relationship, negatively valenced writing
was predicted yield higher ratings rediscovery of self-concept and positive adjustment among
participants in the ex-relationship condition, but yield lower scores on these variables among
participants in the friendship condition.
Hypothesis 2: Adverse Outcomes
A two-way interaction of valence (positive versus negative) and relationship type (exrelationship versus friendship) was predicted with regard to adverse outcomes. Negatively
valenced writing was predicted yield higher ratings loss of self-concept and negative adjustment
among participants in the ex-relationship condition, but yield lower scores on these variables
among participants in the friendship condition.
Hypothesis 3: Affect Congruence
A main effect was predicted with respect to affect such that participants in the negatively
valenced writing conditions were expected to report greater negative affect and lower positive
affect.
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CHAPTER 3
METHODS
Power Analysis
No previous study has examined how writing about differential thought content valence
about an ex-relationship may influence relationship adjustment for individuals who have
experienced a romantic relationship breakup. A power analysis was conducted for small,
medium, and large effect sizes. Assuming a small effect (.2 to .3) and a power of .8, this study
would require a sample of 90 to 199 participants. Assuming a medium effect (.5) size and a
power of .8, this study would require a sample of 34 participants. Assuming a large effect size
(.8), this study would require a sample size of 15 participants (Faul, Erdfelder, Land, & Buchner,
2007). To be more conservative, the goal for this study was to recruit at least 200 participants.
Participants
Undergraduate students from Iowa State University were recruited through an online
research sign-up system (SONA) administered by the Department of Psychology. The research
pool were students currently enrolled in introductory psychology and communication studies
courses who can sign up for studies as one option of gaining credit toward their course research
requirement. Those who have had a romantic relationship end in the past twelve months were
eligible to participate. Following the results of a power analysis, the aim was to recruit at least
200 participants for this study. A small effect size (.2) was used in the power analysis as a
conservative estimate because no study has examined how writing about differential thought
content valence about an ex-relationship may influence relationship adjustment for individuals
who have experienced a romantic relationship breakup.
33
A total of 242 undergraduate students participated in the study. Participants who did not
write about the correct experience throughout the entire writing exercise according to our
manipulation check were removed from further analyses (n = 17). Therefore, 225 participants
were included in the final analyses (MAge = 19.0; SD = 1.7). Most of the participants were
female (66.4%), European American (82.6%; Asian American [7.6%], African American [3.6%],
Multiracial American [2.7%], Latino/Latina American [2.7%], and American Indian/Alaskan
Native [0.4%]), heterosexual (95.1%; bisexual [2.7%], gay [0.9%], questioning [0.4%],
pansexual [0.4%]) and currently single (68.9%). The average length of time since their most
recent breakup was 6.0 months (SD = 3.9).
Study Design
Participants (N =225) were randomly assigned to a 2 (Relationship: ex-relationship vs.
friendship) x 2 (Valence: positive vs. negative) between subjects experimental designed. All
participants engaged in a writing activity where they described a memory from a relationship.
Participants in the ex-partner condition (n = 122) described a memory involving an ex-romantic
partner. Participants in the friendship conditions (n = 103) described a memory involving a
friend. Participants in the positive valance condition (n = 110) were instructed to write about a
positive memory whereas participants in the negative valence conditions (n = 115) were
instructed to write about a negative memory.
Measures
Participants responded to background questions about their ex-relationship as well as
measures of current affect (Watson, Clark, & Tellegen, 1988), self-concept clarity
(Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007), and adjustment to the breakup (Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007)
34
using self-report measures. Information on each of these measures is provided below, and all
experimental measures are included in Appendix A.
Self-Concept
The rediscovery of self scale (ROSS) and the Loss of Self Scale (LOSS; Lewandowski &
Bizzoco, 2007) were used to measure positive and negative self-concept adjustment after a
romantic relationship breakup. The Rediscovery of Self Scale (ROSS; Lewandowski & Bizzoco,
2007) is a 6-item scale that measures the degree to which participants felt they had become
reacquainted with aspects of the self since their romantic breakup. Participants rate how well
each item describes them since their romantic relationship ended using a 7-point Likert scale
ranging from 1 (not at all) to 7 (a great deal) with higher scores indicating greater rediscovery of
self. A sample items is “‘I have reclaimed lost parts of myself that I could not express while
with my partner.” The ROSS has been positively associated with greater acceptance, positive
emotions, and inversely associated with denial (Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007). It has also
been associated with greater negatively valenced thoughts about an ex-relationship and lower
positively valenced thoughts about an ex-relationship (Brenner & Vogel, 2015). Internal
consistency has been demonstrated in previous studies, ranging from .88 (Brenner & Vogel,
2015) to .91 (Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007). In the current study, the ROSS yielded an internal
consistency of .90.
The LOSS is a 6-item scale that measures the extent to which one has experienced selfconcept loss after the end of a romantic relationship. Participants use 7-point Likert scale
ranging from 1 (not at all) to 7 (a great deal) to rate how well each item describes them since
their breakup, with higher scores indicating a greater loss of self-concept. A sample items is “I
do not know who I am.” The LOSS has been positively associated positive ex-relationship
35
thoughts, negative ex-relationship thoughts (Brenner & Vogel, 2015), negative emotions, denial,
and mental disengagement (Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007). Internal consistency has been
demonstrated in previous studies, ranging from .90, (Lewandowski & Bizzoco, 2007) to .94
(Brenner & Vogel, 2015). In the current study, the LOSS yielded an internal consistency of .87.
Positive and Negative Relationship Adjustment
The relationship adjustment measure (Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007) was used to assess
post-dissolution adjustment. The 18-item measure consists of positive adjustment and negative
adjustment subscales. Participants rate the extent to which they experience specific emotions
when currently thinking about their lost partner and relationship on a 7-point Likert scale from 1
(not at all) to 7 (very much). Examples of items assessing positive adjustment include “happy,”
“satisfied,” and “relieved. “Examples of negative adjustment include “hurt”, “disappointed”, and
“lonely”. The scale was adapted from an earlier study (Sprecher, 1994) wherein the directions
were altered to inquire about the participants’ current feelings when thinking about the breakup,
as opposed to how they felt initially after the breakup. Further, the original version of this
measure, Sprecher (1994) used nine items to capture negative adjustment and five items to
capture positive adjustment after a breakup. Saffrey and Ehrenberg (2007) included four more
positive adjustment items, which they took from Sanna & Turley-Ames’ (2000) study of
counterfactual thinking (i.e., “if only” mental simulations of alternative outcomes). Responses
for each subscale are averaged to calculate their respective scores, with higher scores indicating
greater positive adjustment or greater negative adjustment congruent with the respective
dimension of adjustment. Construct validity has been provided for both subscales. The positive
adjustment subscale has been associated with less relationship preoccupation, greater levels of
reflection, and greater levels of general positive adjustment (Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007). The
36
negative adjustment subscale has been associated with greater relationship preoccupation, lower
levels of reflection, lower levels of general positive adjustment (Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007),
greater positive ex-relationship thoughts and negative ex-relationship thoughts (Brenner &
Vogel, 2015). Both the positive adjustment and negative adjustment subscales have
demonstrated good internal consistency, with Cronbach’s alphas of .93 and .88, respectively
(Saffrey & Ehrenberg, 2007). In a recent study of undergraduate students, the positive
adjustment subscale demonstrated an internal consistency of .85 and the negative adjustment
subscale demonstrated an internal consistency of .88 (Brenner & Vogel, 2015). The current study
demonstrated internal consistencies of .93 and .89 for positive adjustment and negative
adjustment, respectively.
Affect
The positive and negative affect scale (PANAS; Watson, Clark, & Tellegen, 1988) was
used to assess state affect of participants immediately after writing about their ex-relationship.
The 20-item scale consists of both positive affect (PANAS PA) items, such as “excited” and
“strong” and negative affect (PANAS NA) items such as “distressed, “upset,” and “guilty”
(Watson et al., 1988, p. 1070). Higher scores indicate more affect on that dimension of current
affect. Previous studies demonstrated the validity of the PANAS through its associations to state
and other measures of positive and negative mood (Watson et al., 1998). Cronbach’s alpha
scores in undergraduate samples for positive mood have ranged from .86 to .90, and for negative
mood have ranged from .84 to .87 (Watson et al., 1988). In a recent study of undergraduate
students at a Midwestern university, the Cronbach’s alpha score for positive mood was .86, and
for negative mood was .78 (Lannin, Guyll, Vogel, & Madon, 2013). Internal reliabilities for the
PANAS PA and PANAS NA in the current study were .88 and .85, respectively.
37
Background Questions About The Breakup
Participants responded to two background questions about the relationship breakup: “how
long ago did the relationship end?” and “who ended the relationship? (l = me to 7 = my
partner)”.
Experimental Manipulation of Valence and Relationship Type
Participants were randomly assigned to one of four ten-minute writing exercises designed
to elicit either reminiscing about positively or negatively valenced memories from either their
ex-relationship or from a friendship. Instructions for each writing condition (see Appendix C)
were adapted from Lepore and Greenberg (2002). In the positive ex-relationship condition,
participants were instructed to recall and write about a positive memory from and/or positive
aspects of their most recent romantic relationship. In the negative ex-relationship condition,
participants were instructed to recall and write about a negative memory from and/or negative
aspects of their most recent romantic relationship. In the positive friendship condition,
participants were instructed to recall and write about a positive memory from and/or positive
aspects of a friendship that is important to them. In the negative friendship condition, participants
were instructed to recall and write about a negative memory from and/or negative aspects of a
friendship that is important to them.
Manipulation Check
Written responses were first examined to confirm that participants followed directions for
the respective manipulated condition. An undergraduate research Helpant who was blind to the
assigned conditions read each response and rated which condition they thought the participant
was assigned to see whether this matched their actual assigned condition. The research Helpant
also examined whether the participant followed the directions for his or her entire response.
38
Participants who did not write about the correct experience through the entire writing exercise
were removed from further analyses.
Procedure
IRB approval was obtained prior to the commencement of this study (see Appendix B).
Participants signed up for the study online through SONA on a first-come, first-serve basis. The
study posting on SONA indicated that the study examined the thought content for those who
have experienced a recent romantic relationship breakup. Upon arriving to the laboratory,
participants read and signed an informed consent document that communicated the procedures in
place to maintain anonymity of participant responses. Subsequently, participants responded to
background questions about the relationship breakup.
Participants were randomly assigned to one of the four ten-minute writing exercises (i.e.,
positive ex-relationship, negative ex-relationship, positive friendship, or negative friendship).
After this experimental manipulation of thought content valence and relationship type,
participants completed the PANAS to measure positive and negative affect, the LOSS to measure
perceived loss of self-concept since the breakup, the ROSS to measure rediscovery of selfconcept since the breakup, the relationship adjustment measure to measure positive and negative
adjustment to the breakup, and demographic items (e.g., age, gender). At the conclusion of the
study, participants were debriefed, asked to maintain confidentiality regarding the nature of the
study, and dismissed.
39
CHAPTER 4
RESULTS
Manipulation Check
Seventeen participants did not write about the correct experience through the entire
writing exercise and were removed from further analyses. A total of 225 participants were
included in the final analyses.
Primary Analyses
To examine the proposed hypotheses, which involve differential effects of valence within
different relationship types on adaptive outcomes, adverse outcomes, and affect, a series of
MANCOVA and ANCOVA analyses were conducted using the same model with all dependent
variables. Namely, independent variables were valence (positive versus negative) and
relationship type (ex-relationship versus friendship), and their interaction term. Covariates were
initiator status and time since the relationship ended. I also examined the inclusion of possible
interaction terms—specifically, interactions between the covariates and each condition—to
determine if they should be included in the final model. Results did not suggest that the inclusion
of any additional significant interaction terms added significantly to the model (ps > .05). As
such, the original model was used for subsequent analyses. A series of linear regression analyses
were also conducted to examine for issues with collinearity and for cases of influential data
points. Results did not demonstrate any issues with collinearity or influential data points.
Descriptive information for each condition and dependent variable are provided in Table 1.
40
Table 1
Descriptive Statistics of All Outcome Measures by Experimental Manipulation of Valence and
Relationship Type
n Time ROSS Positive
Adjustment
LOSS Negative
Adjustment
Positive
Affect
Negative
Affect
Positive
Ex-Relationship 57 3.12
(1.81)
3.61
(1.56)
3.70
(1.46)
1.94
(1.21)
3.22
(1.29)
2.61
(0.82)
1.69
(0.61)
Negative ExRelationship 53 3.30
(2.00)
4.43
(1.51)
4.12
(1.44)
2.02
(1.24)
3.31
(1.40)
3.16
(0.63)
1.43
(0.43)
Positive
Friendship 65 3.55
(1.83)
4.41
(1.50)
3.76
(1.63)
2.03
(1.15)
3.44
(1.43)
2.64
(0.93)
1.92
(0.72)
Negative
Friendship 50 3.26
(1.76)
3.75
(1.74)
3.49
(1.59)
2.30
(1.45)
3.51
(1.51)
2.64
(0.78)
1.86
(0.70)
Note: Means are presented with standard deviations in parentheses.
Hypothesis 1: Adaptive Outcomes
An interaction between valence and relationship type was hypothesized. Specifically, it
was predicted that those in the ex-relationship condition would indicate lower ratings of
rediscovery of self-concept and positive adjustment if they wrote about positively valenced
memories, whereas those in the friendship condition would indicate lower ratings if they wrote
about negatively valenced memories. First, a MANCOVA was conducted with rediscovery of
self-concept and positive adjustment as the dependent variables. No main effects were found for
valence, F (2, 219) = 1.437, p = .240, η2= .001, or relationship type, F (2, 219) = 0.145, p =
.865, η2= .01. However, consistent with hypotheses, a significant interaction effect between
valence and relationship conditions was present, F (1, 219) = 4.96, p < .05, η2= .02.
To further examine the impact of relationship of valence and relationship type on each of
the outcomes, separate ANCOVA analyses were conducted for each dependent variable (see
Table 2 and Table 3). As demonstrated in Table 2, there were no main effects for rediscovery of
self-concept for valence, F (1, 219) = 0.297, p = .586, η2 = .001 or relationship type, F (1, 219) =
41
0.097, p = .756, η2 = .000. As demonstrated in Table 3, there were also no main effects for
valence, F (1, 219) = 1.525, p = .596, η2 = .007, or relationship type, F (1, 219) = 0.218, p =
.596, η2 = .001, on positive adjustment.
Table 2
ANCOVA of Model Predicting ROSS
Source df SS MS F
Initiator 1 16.23 16.23 6.79*
Length 1 6.48 6.48 2.71
Valence 1 0.71 0.71 0.30
Relationship 1 0.23 0.23 0.10
Valence * Relationship 1 15.52 15.52 15.52***
Corrected Model 5 54.64 10.93
4.57** Error 219 523.86 2.39
Corrected Total 224 578.50
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Table 3
ANCOVA of Model Predicting Positive Adjustment
Source df SS MS F
Initiator 1 72.26 72.26 35.92***
Length 1 6.51 6.51 3.23
Valence 1 3.10 3.10 1.19
Relationship 1 0.57 0.57 0.26
Valence * Relationship 1 10.00 10.00 5.0*
Corrected Model 5 90.75 18.15
9.00*** Error 219 441.84 2.02
Corrected Total 224 532.59
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Confirming the hypothesis, ANCOVA analyses did indicate significant interaction effects in
predicting rediscovery of self-concept, F (1, 219) = 15.52, p < .001, η2 = .07, and positive
adjustment, F (1, 219) = 4.96, p < .05, η2 = .02 such that there were differences between positive
and negative valence for each relationship type, but in opposite directions (see Table 4). That is,
within the ex-relationship conditions, those who wrote about negative memories reported greater
42
rediscovery of self (Madj = 4.49) than those who wrote about positive memories (Madj = 3.55).
Conversely, within the friendship conditions, rediscovery of self-concept ratings were lower for
those who wrote about negative memories (Madj = 3.72) than those who wrote about positive
memories (Madj = 4.44). Partial eta-squared (η2
), used as a measurement of effect size, examines
the ratio of variance in the dependent variable accounted for by the selected independent variable
when controlling for other variables. The partial eta-squared of the interaction term in predicting
rediscovery of self indicated a medium to large effect size (η2 = .07; Cohen, 1988).
Pairwise comparisons revealed that participants in the negative ex-relationship condition
indicated significantly higher rediscovery of self-ratings compared to those in the positive exfriendship condition (ΔMadj = 0.94, p < .01, 95% CI [.38, 1.50]) and negative friendship
condition (ΔMadj = 0.76, p < .05, 95% CI [0.18, 1.34]). There were also higher ratings of
rediscovery of self in the positive friendship condition compared with the negative friendship
condition (ΔMadj = 0.71, p < .05, 95% CI [0.11, 1.32]) and the positive ex-relationship condition
(ΔMadj = 0.89, p < .01, 95% CI [-1.48, -.31]).
Positive adjustment was also larger for the negative ex-relationship condition (Madj =
3.78) than the positive ex-relationship condition (Madj = 3.59), whereas within the friendship
conditions, ratings of positive adjustment were highest for the positive valence condition (Madj =
4.12) and lowest for negative valence condition (Madj = 3.46). The effect size of this interaction
(η2 = .02) indicates that this is a small yet meaningful interaction. Pairwise comparisons revealed
that participants in the positive friendship condition indicated significantly higher positive
adjustment than those the negative friendship condition (ΔMadj = 0.66, p < .05, 95% CI [0.1,
1.22]) and marginally significantly higher ratings than participants the positive romantic
condition (ΔMadj = 0.53, p = .053, 95% CI [-0.01, 1.07]). Overall, the results of the ANCOVA
43
tests supported the hypothesis of an interaction between valence and relationship type such that
positive valence was more adaptive in the friendship condition only.
Table 4
Adjusted Means and Simple Main Effects for ROSS and Positive Adjustment
Rediscovery of Self
Valence
Relationship Positive Negative M (SE) ∆M (SE)
Ex-Relationship 3.55 (.21) 4.49 (.19) 4.02 (.14) -0.94 (.29)**
Friendship 4.44 (.21) 3.27 (.22) 4.08 (.15) 0.71 (.31)*
M (SE) 3.99 (.15) 4.11 (.15) 4.05 (.10) -0.11 (.21)
∆M (SE) -0.89 (.30) 0.76 (.29)* -0.07 (.21)
Positive Adjustment
Valence
Relationship Positive Negative M (SE) ∆M (SE)
Ex-Relationship 3.59 (.19) 3.78 (.18) 3.69 (.13) -0.19 (.26)
Friendship 4.12 (.20) 3.46 (.20) 3.79 (.14) 0.67 (.28)*
M (SE) 3.86 (.14) 3.62 (.14) 3.74 (.01) 0.24 (.19)
∆M (SE) -0.53 (.27) 0.33 (.27) -.10 (.19)
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Figure 1 and Figure 2. Estimated marginal mean rediscovery of self and positive adjustment,
respectively, by experimental manipulation of valence and relationship type.
3
3.5
4
4.5
5
Positive Negative
ROSS
Valence
Ex-Relationship Friendship
3
3.5
4
4.5
5
Positive Negative
Positive Adjustment
Valence
Ex-Relationship Friendship
44
Hypothesis 2: Adverse Outcomes
It was hypothesized that self-ratings of loss of self-concept and negative adjustment
would be highest for those who wrote about positive ex-relationship memories and negative
friendship memories and lowest for those who wrote about negative ex-relationship memories
and positive friendship memories. A MANCOVA was performed to examine this hypothesized
interaction effect. No main effects were found for valence F (2, 219) = .407, p = .666, η2 = .00 or
relationship type, F (2, 219) = 0.757, p = .470, η2 = .01. Results did not indicate a significant
interaction effect between valence and relationship type F (1, 219) = 1.11, p = .332, η2 = .01. To
examine each dependent variable separately, two-way ANCOVAs were performed separately for
both loss of self-concept (see Table 5) and for negative adjustment (see Table 6). As
demonstrated in Table 5 and Table 6, analyses did not indicate a significant interaction effect for
loss self-concept, F (1, 219) = 2.15, p = .144, η2 = .01, or negative adjustment F (1, 219) = 0.97,
p = .326, η2 = .00, respectively. Overall, the results did not support this hypothesis that selfratings of loss of self-concept and negative adjustment would be highest for those who wrote
about negative friendship memories and lowest for those who wrote about negative exrelationship memories. Estimated marginal means, main effects, and simple main effects are
reported in Table 7. Figure 4 and Figure 5 offer visual representations of the estimated marginal
means.
45
Table 5.
ANCOVA of Model Predicting LOSS
Source df SS MS F
Initiator 1 8.78 8.78 6.26*
Length 1 33.91 33.91 24.17***
Valence 1 0.57 0.57 .29
Relationship 1 2.08 2.08 1.48
Valence * Relationship 1 3.02 3.02 2.15
Corrected Model 5 47.20 9.44
6.73*** Error 219 175.58 2.39
Corrected Total 224 354.48
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Table 6
ANCOVA of Model Predicting Negative Adjustment
Source df SS MS F
Initiator 1 33.13 33.13 7.18***
Length 1 24.00 24.00 19.09***
Valence 1 1.34 1.34 0.67
Relationship 1 1.11 1.11 0.66
Valence * Relationship 1 1.68 1.68 0.97
Corrected Model 5 62.28 12.46
7.18*** Error 219 380.10 1.74
Corrected Total 224 442.37
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Figure 3 and Figure 4. Estimated marginal mean loss of self and negative adjustment,
respectively, by experimental manipulation of valence and relationship type.
1
1.5
2
2.5
3
Positive Negative
LOSS
Valence
Ex-Relationship Friendship
2
2.5
3
3.5
4
Positive Negative
Negative Adjustment
Valence
Ex-Relationship Friendship
46
Table 7.
Estimated Marginal Means, Main Effects and Simple Main Effects for LOSS and Negative
Adjustment
Loss of Self
Valence
Relationship Positive Negative M (SE) ∆M (SE)
Ex-Relationship 2.05 (.16) 1.91 (.15) 1.98 (.11) 0.13 (.22)
Friendship 2.01 (.216) 2.31 (.17) 2.17 (.12) -0.34 (.23)
M (SE) 2.03 (.11)) 2.13 (.11) 2.08 (.08) -0.10 (.16)
∆M (SE) 0.43 (.23) -0.43 (.23) -0.19 (.16)
Negative Adjustment
Valence
Relationship Positive Negative M (SE) ∆M (SE)
Ex-Relationship 3.34 (.18) 3.32 (.17) 3.33 (.12) 0.02 (.24)
Friendship 3.30 (.18) 3.63 (.29) 3.47 (.13) -0.32 (.26)
M (SE) 3.32 (.13) 3.48 (.12) 3.40 (.01) -0.16 (.18)
∆M (SE) 0.04 (.25) -0.32 (.25) -0.14 (.18)
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Hypothesis 3: Affect Congruence
A main-effect of affect congruence was hypothesized such that those who wrote about
negatively valenced memories would indicate higher ratings of negative affect and lower ratings
of positive affect. Supporting the hypothesis, ANCOVA results (see Table 8 and Table 9)
demonstrated a main effect of valence F (1, 219) = 4.66, p < .05, η2 = .02; those in the positively
valence conditions (Madj = 2.88) reported higher ratings of positive affect than those in the
negative valence conditions (Madj = 2.64). Results also indicated a main effect of relationship
type, F (1, 219) = 6.42, p < .05, η2 = .03, where those who wrote about a friendship (Madj = 2.90)
reported higher ratings of positive affect compared with those who wrote about an exrelationship (Madj = 2.62).
47
Table 8
ANCOVA of Model Predicting Positive Affect
Source df SS MS F
Initiator 1 0.04 0.04 0.07
Length 1 0.44 0.44 0.67
Valence 1 3.48 3.48 4.66*
Relationship 1 4.29 4.29 6.42*
Valence * Relationship 1 3.58 3.58 5.64*
Corrected Model 5 11.73 2.35
3.59** Error 219 143.29 0.65
Corrected Total 224 155.02
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Table 9
Estimated Marginal Means, Main Effects and Simple Main Effects for Positive Affect
Positive Affect
Valence
Relationship Positive Negative M (SE) ∆M (SE)
Ex-Relationship 2.62 (.11) 2.63 (.10) 2.62 (.07) -0.01 (.15)
Friendship 3.16 (.11) 2.65 (.11) 2.90 (.08) 0.51 (.16)**
M (SE) 2.89 (.08) 2.64 (.08) 2.76 (.05) 0.25 (.11)*
∆M (SE) -0.53 (.16)** -0.02 (.15) -0.28 (.11)*
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
ANCOVA results also supported the main effects for negative affect, wherein those in the
negative valence conditions reported higher ratings of negative affect, F (1, 219) = 12.91, p <
.01, η2 = .06 (see Table 8 and Table 9). The main effect of relationship type, F (1, 219) = 3.50, p
= .063, and the interaction term, F (1, 219) = 3.07 p = .081, η2 = .01, were not significant. As the
interaction term was significant for positive affect, pairwise comparisons were examined for
simple main effects (see Table 10). Results indicated significantly higher ratings of negative
affect from those in the negative friendship condition compared to those in the positive
friendship condition (ΔMadj = 0.44, p < .01, 95% CI [0.20, .68]). In addition, those in the positive
48
ex-relationship condition indicated higher negative affect ratings than those in positive friendship
condition (ΔMadj = 0.30, p < .05 95% CI [.07, .53]).
Table 9
ANCOVA of Model Predicting Negative Affect
Source df SS MS F
Initiator 1 0.39 0.39 1.04
Length 1 5.00 5.00 13.32***
Valence 1 4.85 4.85 12.16**
Relationship 1 1.32 1.32 3.43
Valence * Relationship 1 1.53 1.53 3.07
Corrected Model 5 13.38 2.68
7.12** Error 219 82.27 0.38
Corrected Total 224 95.64
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Table 10
Estimated Marginal Means, Main Effects and Simple Main Effects for Negative Affect
Negative Affect
Valence
Relationship Positive Negative M (SE) ∆M (SE)
Ex-Relationship 1.73 (.08) 1.88 (.08) 1.80 (.06) -0.15 (.11)
Friendship 1.43 (.08) 1.87 (.09) 1.65 (.06) -0.44 (.12)***
M (SE) 1.58 (.06) 1.88 (.06) 1.73 (.04) -0.30 (.08)***
∆M (SE) 0.30 (.12)* 0.01 (.12) 0.15 (.08)
*p < .05 **p < .01 ***p < .001
Interestingly, an interaction effect was also found, F (1, 219) = 5.46, p < .05, η2 = .02,
where those in the positive friendship condition reported higher positive affect ratings (Madj =
3.16) than those in the other conditions, namely, negative friendship (Madj = 2.65), positive exrelationship (Madj = 2.62), and negative ex-relationship (Madj = 2.63). Pairwise comparisons to
examine the simple main effects indicated that writing about positively valenced friendship
memories elicited greater positive affect that writing about negatively valenced friendship
49
memories, (ΔMadj = 0.51, p < .01, 95% CI [.19, .82]) and positively valenced ex-relationship
memories (ΔMadj = 0.53, p < .01, 95% CI [0.23, .84]). This indicates that the positive impact of
valence on affect typically seen with positively valenced thinking, including here with those
writing about a friendship, did not occur with those writing about positively valenced memories
specific to a previous romantic relationship. Estimated marginal means, main effects, and simple
main effects are reported in Table 8. Figure 6 offers a visual representation of the estimated
marginal means for positive affect.
Figure 6. Estimated marginal mean positive affect by experimental manipulation of valence and
relationship type.
1
1.5
2
2.5
3
Positive Negative
Positive Affect
Valence
Ex-Relationship Friendship
50
CHAPTER 5
DISCUSSION
The current study examined the immediate effects of engaging in predominantly
positively or predominantly negatively valenced thinking about one’s most recent romantic exrelationship and whether these effects are unique from thinking about memories from a nonromantic relationship. Overall, findings supported the notion that recalling positive memories
from a relationship may make it more difficult to move on from the relationship that ended,
whereas recalling negative memories may make moving on easier. As expected, participant
ratings of rediscovery of self-concept and greater positive adjustment were higher in the negative
ex-relationship condition relative to the positive ex-relationship condition. Conversely,
participants in the positive friendship condition reported greater rediscovery of self-concept and
positive adjustment compared to those in the negative friendship condition. Participants in both
negatively valenced conditions indicated higher ratings of negative affect. Thus, although
individuals may feel more negative affect after recalling negative memories, there still seems to
be some adaptive aspect to this form of recall. This contrast illustrates the unique impact of exrelationship memories, which are also what people tend to frequently think about when a
relationship ends (Field et al., 2009). That is, the fact that negatively valenced memories were
more advantageous relative to positively valenced memories only within the ex-relationship
conditions suggests that this finding is a result of the valence within the specific context of exrelationship memories and not simply the result of the negative valence itself.
Interestingly, while content valence of ex-relationship thoughts may differentially impact
the way in which one adapts to a relationship breakup, findings in the current study did not
suggest any meaningful differences in how they may differentially influence adverse outcomes.
51
No significant interaction or main effects were found in predicting loss of self-concept and
negative adjustment. Although results from these constructs did not follow the hypothesized
predictions, these findings actually make sense when examining Brenner and Vogel’s (2015)
PANERT development study more precisely. When they assessed positive content valence and
negative content valence as separate constructs, they were differentially linked to outcomes
related to moving on in the same pattern found in the current study. That is, negatively valenced
thoughts were positively linked to outcomes related to moving on, and positively valenced
thoughts were inversely linked to these adaptive outcomes. Moreover, both positively valenced
and negatively valenced thoughts from an ex-relationship were positively linked to more
distressing outcomes.
Results in the current study mirror those found by Brenner and Vogel (2015) and speak to
an interesting pattern: thinking about an ex-relationship may exacerbate negative outcomes from
a breakup regardless of content valence, whereas thinking about negative qualities may also
increase positive outcomes related to moving forward. An individual may feel worse when
thinking about an ex-partner regardless of the valenced thought. As feelings of moving forward
are newer and feelings of loss are more familiar, it may take more powerful interventions to
mitigate these effects further. It’s possible that these unpleasant feelings remind an individual of
how they felt after the breakup.
These above differences in valence and outcomes were found despite the suggestion from
researchers that the way in which valence can influence attitudes is through the affect that the
valenced thought elicits, and this affect ends to be congruent with the valence of the thought
(Segerstrom et al., 2003). In the current study, this congruence was found for both positive and
negative affect, where those in positive conditions reported higher positive affect and those in the
52
negative condition reported greater negative affect. However, there was also an unexpected
interaction between relationship type and valence in predicting positive affect. It was expected
that individuals in the positive valence conditions would report higher ratings of positive affect
due to the tendency for affect to be congruent with content valence; yet, those in the friendship
condition reported greater positive affect than those in all other conditions, including positive exrelationship, who indicated statistically equivalent ratings with each other. In other words, the
affect congruence with positive valence was only present in those who wrote about a friendship.
Those who wrote about positively or negatively ex-relationship thoughts experienced the same
level of positive affect as those who wrote about negatively valenced thoughts about a
friendship.
There are several possible explanations for this finding. First, consider the results for
negative affect. The predicted main effect for content valence was demonstrated, where negative
content valence participants reported more negative affect. Although not significant, there was a
marginal main effect of relationship type, where those in the ex-relationship condition reported
greater negative affect. Given this potential difference by relationship type, thinking about an exrelationship is difficult in and of itself; therefore, the unpleasantness of recalling a memory from
a previous romantic relationship may dampen the positive impact of positive content valence
recall.
Another possibility is that the affect immediately following the writing activity does not
match the affect during exact moments of recall. This may be particularly salient for those in the
positive ex-relationship condition, because they are recalling memories from a time where their
relationship status is different from the present. Considering how a person may positively
appraise a relationship if they experience positive affect when recalling a related memory,
53
positively valenced thinking could reframe the ex-relationship in a positive light and reinforcing
desire for an ex-partner. Remembering self-regulation theory, the discrepancy between an
individual’s current state and desired state can elicit distress and negative affect. Thinking about
relationship-positive experiences might feel good in the moment; however, this positive emotion
may evaporate upon reconnecting with this discrepancy, or the reality that the relationship no
longer exists. Finally, individuals may be reluctant to admit to experiencing this congruent affect
due to the social pressure to move forward from an ended relationship (Sas & Whittaker, 2013).
Limitations and Future Directions
As mentioned above, having participants respond to a self-report measure of affect
immediately following the writing activity might not capture the exact affect experienced as the
activity takes place. Future research could address this concern through the use of physiological
measurement. Studies using event-related brain potentials (ERPs) indicate distinct neural
correlates related to positive and negative affect during affective picture processing. For instance,
the early posterior negativity (EPN) and a later posterior slow wave appear to reflect the
processing of negative valence, while the P3 appeared to reflect the processing positivity valence
(Bailey, West, & Mullaney, 2012). Additionally, these effects were modulated by how
individuals were oriented to the pictures. Individuals responding to a self-report measure of
affect might experience a shift in affect immediately after recall, or may be reluctant to indicate
positive affect due to the social pressure. ERPs could provide an honest assessment of how an
individual responds to these affect-laden memories during recall.
The confound of timing (i.e., past or present) in the relationship conditions is also an
important limitation to address. The inclusion of the friendship condition helped distinguish that
the results for the ex-relationship conditions were specific to the nature of valence in the context
54
of ex-relationship-memories specifically as opposed to valence within interpersonal memories
more generally. In addition, because social support is an adaptive coping mechanism, friendship
memories may help represent the common experience of seeking social support after a breakup.
However, participants in the ex-relationship condition wrote about a relationship that was in the
past and romantic, and participants in the friendship condition wrote about a relationship that
was current and platonic. Results were interpreted as an interaction of valence and relationship
type; however, it is possible that these findings relate to an interaction of valence and time (i.e.,
past or present relationship). If the latter is true, it would not negate the findings of the current
study; rather, it would suggest that the results from the current study could generalize to moving
on from other relationships that have ended, such as a friendship fallout or certain forms of grief.
Future studies could compare the influence of positive valence and negative valence across
different relationship types that have ended and as well as current.
All outcome measures in this study were self-report scale measures. Examining Figure 3
and Figure 4, the negative outcomes demonstrate a visual pattern in line with the hypotheses, yet
the effect size is too small to be significant. This lack of significance may reflect a truly
insignificant effect, or it may relate to the use of scale measures as outcome variables. Although
scale measurement offers several advantages, the effect of the manipulation may fade over time
as participants respond to multiple scale items within each measure. One alternative method to in
capture the immediate impact of ex-relationship memory valence is the use of behavioral
outcome measures. For example, after the writing activity, participants could be offered free
enrollment in an online dating website. A behavioral measure of this sort implemented directly
following the intervention would best capture the immediate effect of the manipulation. Findings
also could be more directly generalized to real world behavior.
55
In addition, a longitudinal study where participants engage in the writing activity on
multiple occasions could examine how valenced memory recall may play out over time. This
would also support the usefulness of scale measurement as outcomes because we would be
interested in both the immediate effects of the writing activity as well as the broader change
caused by the outcomes over time. Moreover, researchers could assess how immediate effects
seen after initial interventions may interact with self-report responses in the longer term.
There are also limitations regarding the sample. Participants were students from Iowa
State University who experienced a breakup within the past year. Collecting data from these
students and controlling for time since the breakup allowed for more efficient participant
recruitment. Even though this research produced several meaningful and significant findings, it is
possible that the impact of content valence is even more powerful than indicated by these results.
Future researchers could limit the sample to those who experienced a very recent breakup, such
as within the previous month. This could capture responses while in a more distressed state. In
addition, since this is a college student sample, it is possible that participants were writing about
their first major breakup. Collecting information about the number of breakups experienced by
the participants could lend information regarding whether how people respond to a breakup
changes with more experience. The majority of participants identified as European American.
Cross-cultural differences in responding to a breakup would be important to examine. Values
vary between cultures and also contribute to cognitions (Cross, Morris & Gore, 2002). Future
researchers could conduct this study with diverse samples and also examine for values or themes
that may vary between participants from diverse cultural backgrounds.
56
Conclusion
Findings from the current study suggest that there are different immediate state-induced
effects as a result of engaging in predominantly positively valenced or predominantly negatively
valenced thinking about one’s most recent romantic ex-relationship. Specifically, results lend
support to an emerging idea that positively valenced reflection on a romantic relationship that
ended may be harmful, whereas negatively valenced reflection may actually have beneficial
features. Previous research has examined this concept using associations of pertinent breakup
outcomes with a scale measure of the degree to which individuals think about positive and
negative aspects from their ex-relationship in general (Brenner & Vogel, 2015). The current
experiment built upon this line of research by examining the immediate state-induced effects of
differentially valenced thoughts about an ex-relationship and establishing a causal link with these
observed effects. Results indicate that the differential impact of content valence was specific to
outcomes related to moving on from the relationship as opposed to focusing on the unpleasant
consequences of the breakup. The current study also extends our understanding of this pattern by
differentiating the impact of content valence of ex-relationship thoughts from thoughts about a
non-romantic relationship. Results indicate that impact of content valence is unique in this
context from other interpersonal types of memory. The directions in which valence of exrelationship thoughts related to these outcomes were the opposite from how valence impacted
these outcomes when thinking about a friend.
Thinking about a romantic relationship after it ends is a common and distressing response
to a breakup. The current study examined thought content valence, which can impact the
appraisal or meaning we attach to the subject of our thoughts (Segerstrom et al., 2003) including
our romantic relationships (Alea & Bluck, 2007; Bazzini et al., 2007). Even though thinking
57
about an ex-relationship in a negatively valenced way may feel hurtful in the moment, results
indicated that this negatively valenced way may actually decrease the appeal of that exrelationship and, in turn, encourage positive feelings toward no longer being with the ex-partner
and help individuals to move on. Continued examination of the unique impact of content valence
in this context could play a meaningful role in the advancement of coping responses specific to
the common, yet painful, experience of a romantic relationship breakup.
58
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APPENDIX A
EXPERIMENTAL MEASURES
Rediscovery of Self Scale (ROSS)
DIRECTIONS: Please rate the degree to which the following phrases are true of you since your
relationship breakup. Responses range from 1 (not at all) to 7 (a great deal).
To score: Average items—1 through 6.
Not
at all Rarely Infrequently Somewhat Moderately
A
fair
bit
A
great
deal
1. I have done the things I once
enjoyed that I could not do while
I was in my relationship.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
2. I have regained my identity. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
3. I have reclaimed lost parts of
myself that I could not express
while with my partner.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
4. I have focused more on my needs
that were neglected while with
my partner.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
5. I have become reacquainted with
the person I was before the
relationship.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
6. I have rediscovered who I am. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
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Loss of Self Scale (LOSS)
DIRECTIONS: Please rate the degree to which the following phrases are true of you since your
relationship breakup. Responses range from 1 (not at all) to 7 (a great deal).
To score: Average items—1 through 6.
Not at
all Rarely Infrequently Somewhat Moderately A fair
bit
A great
deal
1. I do not know who I am. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
2. I have lost my sense of self. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
3. I feel as though I am missing a
part of me. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
4. I feel as though many of my
good qualities have been lost. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
5. I do not feel like myself
anymore.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
6. I feel incomplete 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
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Relationship Adjustment Measure
DIRECTIONS: Think about your emotional reactions to your relationship breakup-up and
indicate the extent to which you currently experience the following emotions when you think
about the lost relationship.
To score Positive Adjustment: Average 7 items—2, 3, 5, 6, 8, 11, 14,
To score Negative Adjustment: Average 9 items—1, 4, 7, 9, 10, 12, 13, 15, 16
Not at all Rarely Infrequently Somewhat Moderately A fair
bit
Very
much
1. Depressed 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
2. Content 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
3. Delighted 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
4. Annoyed 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
5. Happy 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
6. Relieved 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
7. Miserable 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8. Pleased 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
9. Disappointed 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
10. Sad 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
11. Glad 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
12. Frustrated 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
13. Hurt 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
14. Satisfied 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
15. Guilty 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
16. Lonely 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
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Positive and Negative Affect Scale (PANAS)
DIRECTIONS: This scale consists of a number of words that describe different feelings and
emotions. Read each item and then circle the appropriate answer in the space next to that word.
Indicate the extent to which you feel each emotion right now.
To score Positive Affect: Sum 10 items—1, 3, 5, 9, 10, 12, 14, 17, 19
To score Negative Affect: Sum 10 items—2, 4, 6, 7, 8, 11, 13, 15, 18, 20
Very slightly or
not at all A little Moderately Quite a bit Extremely
1. Interested 1 2 3 4 5
2. Distressed 1 2 3 4 5
3. Excited 1 2 3 4 5
4. Upset 1 2 3 4 5
5. Strong 1 2 3 4 5
6. Guilty 1 2 3 4 5
7. Scared 1 2 3 4 5
8. Hostile 1 2 3 4 5
9. Enthusiastic 1 2 3 4 5
10. Proud 1 2 3 4 5
11. Irritable 1 2 3 4 5
12. Alert 1 2 3 4 5
13. Ashamed 1 2 3 4 5
14. Inspired 1 2 3 4 5
15. Nervous 1 2 3 4 5
16. Determined 1 2 3 4 5
17. Attentive 1 2 3 4 5
18. Jittery 1 2 3 4 5
19. Active 1 2 3 4 5
20. Afraid 1 2 3 4 5
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Breakup Questions
How long ago did the relationship end (in months)? _______
Who ended the relationship?
Me Mostly Me Somewhat me Mutual Somewhat
Partner
Mostly
Partner
My Partner
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
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APPENDIX B
IRB APPROVAL
77
APPENDIX C
WRITING INSTRUCTIONS
Condition 1 (Positive Ex-Relationship)
Directions: We would like you to think about your last serious relationship. This should be a
relationship that lasted for some time or in which you were seriously emotionally involved
before the breakup. Do not refer to a relationship that broke up after just a few dates.
For the next 10 minutes, please write about a positive memory (e.g., happy, romantic) you had
with your ex-partner when you were together. Describe this memory in as much detail as
possible – what occurred, what you and your partner did, how you felt – really let go and explore
your very deepest emotions and thoughts during the time that this memory took place. Do not
worry about grammar and spelling. If you are done before the ten minutes is up, continue to
describe other memories of this nature.
Condition 2 (Negative Ex-Relationship)
Directions: We would like you to think about your last serious relationship. This should be a
relationship that lasted for some time or in which you were seriously emotionally involved
before the breakup. Do not refer to a relationship that broke up after just a few dates.
For the next 10 minutes, please write about a negative memory (e.g., unhappy, hurtful, sad,
angry) you have with your ex-partner when you were together. Describe this memory in as much
detail as possible – what occurred, what you and your partner did, how you felt – really let go and
explore your very deepest emotions and thoughts during the time that this memory took place.
Do not worry about grammar and spelling. If you are done before the ten minutes is up, continue
to describe other memories of this nature.
Condition 3 (Positive Friendship)
Directions: We would like you to think about a friendship that is important to you. This
friendship should be a relationship that is meaningful and/or has lasted for some time.
For the next 10 minutes, please write about a positive memory (e.g., pleasant, happy) you had
with your friend. Describe this memory in as much detail as possible – what occurred, what you
and your friend did, how you felt – really let go and explore your very deepest emotions and
thoughts during the time that this memory took place. Do not worry about grammar and spelling.
If you are done before the ten minutes is up, continue to describe other memories of this nature.
Condition 4 (Negative Friendship)
Directions: We would like you to think about a friendship that is important to you. This
friendship should be a relationship that is meaningful and/or has lasted for some time.
78
For the next 10 minutes, please write about a negative (e.g., unhappy, hurtful, sad, angry)
memory you had with your friend. Describe this memory in as much detail as possible – what
occurred, what you and your friend did, how you felt – really let go and explore your very
deepest emotions and thoughts during the time that this memory took place. Do not worry about
grammar and spelling. If you are done before the ten minutes is up, continue to describe other
memories of this nature.

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